unbearably "konyotic"

Been out the whole day, went to Quiapo to check on the digicam I had repaired(which was not yet fixed), paid the credit card bill and renewed my NBI clearance.

It was just another urban adventure day, really. Another pleasing and fulfilling day, when...

I was on my way home: tired, but happy, riding the FX. Then there's this guy (im assuming he's male but not necessary masculine) who paid his fare and asked something in this fashion:

"Manong, magkano po papuntang junk-shun, chooweny, oh choowenyfayv?" (20 or 25)

Gimme a fkn break! Wasn't he supposed to say "junkshon, tuwenty, o tuwenty fayb?" or say, "twenty, or twenty five?" What's the deal with that? Why try so hard to sound sophisticated and end up sounding utterly ridiculous.

I seem to be some monstrous, trying-hard social critic, but c'mon, who's not pissed off by these socialites who speak some hybrid english-filipino pseudo-dialect, be it rich, filthy rich, or pretending to be rich? Sure, we comprehend, that's no problem. But why speak that way? See, there's no such thing as taglish. It's just plain irritating how they pronounce these words intentionally. And the way they speak Filipino as if there tounges were tagged with "Made in the USA." But then again, maybe its not there fault, maybe it's their parents who were under the illusion that when their kids spoke in such a manner, the children'll sound, sosyal. Total crap.

So there, I just needed to release that tension eating me. And to that guy, whomever you are, I'm sorry, I've just been keeping this issue inside me long enough. And try to speak proper Filipino, because seriously, you'll get nowhere pronouncing numbers like that, and neither will you get anywhere speaking the vernacular like that. Wait, maybe you'll get admittance into the Filipino United Club Konyo .

Sometimes I feel evil.